The REAL cause of global warming?

The previous theories are all just supposition, and need to be taken with a grain of salt. In reality there is some truth in all of the ideas, but only this one is 100% correct.

First, mankind is responsible for the current global warming. Second, it has nothing to do with carbon dioxide.

Global warming is occurring because of Hot Air. That is right, the world is getting warmer because the air is hotter. Some of you may be thinking I am backwards in saying this and have no proof, but I assure you I am right.

Just look at the graph below


Taken from: http://geology.com/news/images/global-warming-graph.jpg

This graph clearly shows that the cause of global warming is politics. It is well known that politicians are full of hot air (as well as other stuff). Increased political debate causes increased global temperatures due to the hot air emitting from capital buildings all over the world.

For example, the last major cooling trend occurred around 1940. This coincided with WWII. This was a time of action, not debate. Once the debate ended temperatures dropped. Then the war ended, filibuster ensued, and the temperatures have generally been climbing ever after.

The following chart looks even farther back.


Taken from: http://i2.tinypic.com/sb3drl.gif

Here several other political events can be seen which influenced the weather. Rome -- lots of debate, also Christianity missionary work, more debate, temperatures up. Fall of Rome, return of dictatorships, loss of free speech, temperatures down. Vikings -- people afraid to talk and give away their hiding places, temperatures down. Cathedrals -- these are much like modern day Walmarts, everybody used them, but nobody wanted it in their neighborhood (also the Cathedrals were publicly funded, more debate), hotter weather. Black death -- people too busy burring the dead to argue, cooler weather. The mini ice age was caused by the renaissance, everyone just jumped on the band wagon, no debate, no peer reviewed journals, no hot weather.

Then in the late 1700's The United States of America was formed, giving free speech to everybody. Revolution then spread to France, and Russia, and other places too.

As one last evidence that this is the true cause of global warming, consider the USA. It has sunny California, Florida, Arizona, all these hot places are in a free country with lots of debate. Russia has Siberia, and anyone with opinions contrary to the ruling party is 'disappeared.' Not lots of filibuster there. Lots of cold.

So, those of you who are concerned about global warming: "Shut up! You're making it worse!"

More on Global Warming...

Al Gore has been talking about Global Warming and even wrote a book about it.  I can't say I have read it, but from what I have heard he seems to be in favor of it as a whole.  The book was titled "An Inconvenient Truth."

So Mr. Gore, what is Inconvenient about truth?  Is it that you spend over $30,000 in utility bills, or that you don't practice what you preach?  Source Here.  Could be, but I am not sure.  But I am certain of one fact.  Ignorance is Bliss.  Seems any truth which dispels ignorance would be inconvenient.  I know that when I am not blissful it is inconvenient.  Interruptions are inconvenient as well, especially at dinnertime.  See, I got this phone call the other day, and even if its true that I actually could get that rate for refinancing, I don't own the apartment building.  Actually that was less inconvenient and more pain in the... lets just say pain for the sake of the younger readers.  But back to the book. 

After reading the reviews of the book on Amazon.com it seems that some people don't believe in global warming.  He may be referring to a specific inconvenient truth, namely global warming.  It is obvious that man influences the weather, everyone who has washed their car on a sunny day knows that.  It is the modern day rain dance.  Umbrella use also seems to cause rain to an even higher degree.  I just don't know how all those people coordinate carrying their umbrellas.  I must not be getting the right news channel.  

It seems some people just can't realize that because two things coincide they are automatically causal.  This type of reasoning is so important in science that it has been given its own Latin name, a very rare honor.  The phrase is " Post hoc ergo propter hoc," often abreviated to simply post hoc.

It works like this: In past decades there has been a large increase in college admission rates, as well as drug use.  So clearly college admission causes drug use.  I know I saw some interesting things in my undergrad studies.  Yet many people are unwilling to admit that college causes drug use, morons. 

Recent trends in global warming coincided with the industrial revolution, and the increase in CO2 output after the second world war, so clearly they are related, right?  No.  If used incorrectly post hoc analysis can be wrong, as it is in this case. 

Al is right, global warming is real.  But the problem is not carbon dioxide emissions.  He,and so many other scientists picked the wrong causal factor to lay their suppositions on.  Tune in on Friday for the shocking truth.

What is the big deal about global warming? I like the summer.

I am with you on that one, every year the world is warming for about 6 months out of the year (about February - July). Except near the equator, there it is always just hot. Hot and humid.

After looking online it seems that the problem is that the earth likes summer too, and hasn't been cooling off for those other months (August - January) at the same rate it heats up. A good analogy would be my bank account. No, I think that would be a simile, or a corollary... Don't worry, I checked, it seems to be an analogy after all.

So back to my bank account. Just like the heat of the earth my money comes and goes, and if more comes then goes I have what is commonly called a surplus. Surpluses are good things; so we can deduce that global warming is actually good. No, that can't be right.

Well, actually it is more like a loan from Benny, you've seen him, he stands on the corner of Third and Main, always dressed in black leather. See, Benny is like a bank, but he packs heat, and if you don't return your surplus, then you get his heat, which is bad. This usually involves running for your life and laying low for a while.

On a global scale however this is not feasible. There are too many people for everyone to effectively lie low. As a result it is important to avoid global warming.

My post here clearly shows that there is much confusion in the world about global warming, so I have decided to enhance your quest for knowledge by further delving into the world of global warming for the next several posts.